When the Family Unit Crumbles

(A wise son gladdens his father, and a foolish son is the shame of his mother - Prov. 15:20)

Ghanaians watched in horror as a disturbing video emerged of a senior student brutally assaulting a junior in a dormitory at Adisadel College in Ghana. A trivial dispute escalated into a violent altercation, leaving the younger student bloodied and injured. The incident, while troubling on its own, is emblematic of a larger societal problem: the breakdown of the family unit and its profound impact on the younger generation. As the pillars of familial bonding crumble, it is essential to acknowledge the severe consequences, as our society teeters on the brink of a bleak future.

To begin with, the incident provides a startling manifestation of the dissipating values of empathy, compassion, and conflict resolution – qualities traditionally nurtured within the family unit. It is within the home, under the careful tutelage of parents or caregivers, that children learn about respecting others, resolving disputes peacefully, and understanding that violence is not a solution. In the absence of a strong family structure to inculcate these values, the youth are left vulnerable, resorting to violence to assert dominance or settle disagreements.

Furthermore, the reaction of the bystanders, who instead of intervening, decided to record and circulate the video, is equally distressing. This 'bystander effect' signals the normalization of violence, and the de-sensitization towards the suffering of others, qualities that are alarmingly anti-social and inhuman. When family units fail to emphasize the importance of community and the responsibility to protect each other, society inevitably suffers.

Today, as we discuss the horrifying incident at Adisadel College, let's not lose sight of the bigger picture. These students represent our future, and if this incident indicates anything, it is a stern warning about what that future could be if we fail to strengthen our family units.

On 2 April 2021 two teenagers, Felix Nyarko (15 years) and Nicolas Kwame Kani (18 years), were arrested and subsequently charged with the murder of a 10-year-old boy for ritual purposes. As if that was not enough, Felix in open court confessed that he and his accomplices killed a pregnant woman in an earlier incident. With this evidence of fast deteriorating human values, what guarantee do we have when we age and in turn require protection from the very children we gave birth to and care for.

Without doubt, the cost of parents being absent during their children's formative years is often unquantifiable. While parents need to work and pursue their career goals, it is vital to ensure that this doesn't come at the expense of children's emotional and psychological wellbeing.

House-maids and hired caregivers may provide efficient service in terms of childcare and home management, but they can seldom replicate the emotional bond that exists between a parent and child. This bond, nourished through countless interactions and shared experiences, forms the cornerstone of a child's development. It aids in instilling a sense of security, building self-esteem, and shaping a child's worldview.

In an era where dual-income families are the norm, striking a balance between professional and parental responsibilities can be challenging. However, this balance is critical for the holistic development of a child. Parents must prioritize spending quality time with their children, guiding them, and instilling core values such as empathy, respect, and understanding.

What about considering the traditional roles of fathers and mothers, a division of labor designed to sustain familial structures, where each parent contributes their unique strengths as endowed by nature's profound wisdom?

Fathers, historically, have been the providers, while mothers have assumed the role of caregivers. However, in the post-COVID era, the emergence of the 'Work From Home' trend presents us with an unprecedented opportunity. Couldn't we leverage this shift to harmoniously blend tradition with modernization?

Indeed, it's time to reassess our societal norms and structures, taking a cue from our past while aligning it with the needs of the present. By doing so, we can ensure that we don't 'throw the baby out with the bathwater' but instead nurture a healthier, more balanced society.